The Rule of the Internet is that when people argue about something silly, like the color of a goddamn dress, an army of remarkably irritating people will amass to counter that phenomenon and remind you that you are a shallow cock for worrying about the color of a dress. Let's meet these smarm merchants now, shall we?

I think it's obvious now: We need to find a NEW dress to talk about, just to piss these people off a little bit more. #Priorities.