We asked, and you delivered. Here are a few of your worst high school reunion stories:
My 10th was pretty cool. We were still kids, and there wasn't a huge difference between people on the fuck up path and people on the not fuck up path. It got a little awkward at my 20th. My wife's best friend was in charge of planning it, and she has money, so a lot of shit she wanted to do was too expensive for a lot of people, and things got bitter before the reunion even started. It didn't help that I graduated in 1988 and 20 years later that Kenyan fellow was running for president. It was August, the election was over, we were in Jacksonville, FL, and there was an open bar, what could possibly go wrong?
The AC repairman who had married a cheerleader who had gained 75lbs. started bitching about Democrats and taxes. The leftist economist/hedge fund manager said he paid more in taxes last year than the AC repairman would in his entire life, and the AC repairman should shut the fuck up. Then he called him a racist. Then the shouting began.
My wife asked if I was going to do anything. I said no because I had slipped the bartender $50, and she gave me her bottle of Woodford Reserve (it's double oaked). I was posted up getting drunk and trying to hit on the bartender while my wife was standing right there. It didn't work, mostly because my wife is a middle school teacher and the bartender was one of her former students (Jacksonville is a small town), and neither of them was really paying attention to me.
Then a guy asked me if I wanted to get high, and I said hell yeah! So, I smoked weed for the first time in 15 years, and I found out that there had been some serious advances in marijuana technology. Bourbon and modern weed and my poobutt don't mix. When I vomited, it was thick and pasty like a cat's. I got back to my hotel somehow and slept on the balcony because the concrete was cool. I woke up to the blinding sunrise and the worst hangover I've ever had in my entire life. I went inside and drank some hotel tap water because I didn't give a fuck. I breathed into the glass, and my breath bounced out of the glass and into my nose, so I threw up some more. Then my wife called me a fucking asshole.
We skipped the 25th.
From Ron Nick:
In mid-October, I attended my 50th High School Reunion.
Since my parents knew all of my classmates while I was in school, I decided to take my 92 year old Dad to the cocktail party on Friday night.
I got him a drink and let him sit where all of my classmates could just stop by to visit with him.
About an hour into the party, one of the guys asked me if I had checked on Dad...I immediately thought something might be wrong, but when I looked over, he was with a cute 25-30 year old bartender who was doing her best to flirt with him. I laughed and was glad to see he was having a good time!
When the party was winding down, I told Dad that I was going to get the car and that I would meet him at the front door...when I pulled the car up to get him, the bartender was with him, hugging and kissing him! I shouted, "Hey, what's the deal?" She turned to me and replied, "He's so cute...can I take him home with me tonight?".
As much as I was tempted, I had to say "no"...sorry, Dad!
From Michelle Roberson:
At my 25th, we had an "In Memoriam" table. All the students that had passed away over the last 25 years had a lovely framed photo of their senior picture displayed with a small votive candle lit in front of it. About an hour into the reunion, one of my classmates approached our senior class president to inform him that one of the students represented on the table of death was very much alive and lived in the next town over. Awkward....
From Patrick Nichols:
Here is a high school reunion horror story for the ages, and there is even a news report that corroborated the best parts of it!
At our 5 year New Canaan (CT) High School reunion (Class of '04) which was November 28th, 2009, one of our classmates named in the article below refused to pay his bar tab after the open bar part of the event had wrapped up a few hours earlier. He apparently continued to order drinks not realizing that they were being on his personal tab, and was enraged when he was given a bill. Too wasted to understand what was going on and what the mixup was, he went on a barrage that can only be described as epic. After a full fistfight with enormous bouncers, two (2) separate, direct-hit taser blasts from police as they tried to subdue the unwieldily reunion-ite and threats of putting bouncers, cops and authority figures of all shapes and sizes "through a meat grinder", Tyler "The MeatGrinder" Moss was born.
A groups of about 15 of us, all friends from HS still to this day, met at a bar before the actual reunion. I was one of 3 single people. After a few drinks we made our way to the reunion. I didn't know too many faces let alone names as we mingled and grabbed some drinks. After about 30 minutes of socializing, my buddy, his wife and I decided to get something to eat. We grabbed food, buffet style, and saw a table with 3 girls, all single, sitting at a table. I didn't recognize any of them. Being 20 yrs since graduation I wasn't too concerned with it. The 3 girls had name tags but we didn't. One of the girls, I'll call her "Mary" asked if my name was "John." I said yes. I looked at her name tag and said "Mary, how have you been. Its got to be 15 years since I have seen you because I didn't attend the 10 or 15yr reunions." Mind you I had no recollection of who "Mary" is. Without skipping a beat, "Mary" says "um, we dated last summer." Of course I was speechless and not knowing what to do/say, I said "oh yeah my bad I was thinking your were someone else. I'm sorry." "Mary" not buying of of this threw her drink in my direction and got up and left the table with the two friends in tow. My buddy's wife punches me in the arm and says "way to go asshole. how do you not remember dating her." When I find our "Mary's" full name it finally comes back to me. I ran into her at the Jersey Shore (not where Snookie made and ass of herself) but Avalon, NJ., the previous summer and we hooked up. Avalon is a town know for summer hook ups. I hooked up with her ONE night, no sex, and then took her out one other time back in Philly, again no sex. Obviously she thought more about our "dating" than I did. Ever since then when I see or talk to my buddy, his wife asks if I've spoken to "Mary."
Our 30 yr is in 2015 and it should be interesting if "Mary" is there and I remember her this time.
I am not actually sure if this qualifies for "worst" or "best." It's also my mom's reunion story, not mine, because I'm barely old enough for a 10 year reunion, and I didn't go (if they even had one), because I hated most of those people.
Anyway, my mom was at her 10-year, 'round about 20 years ago, and she was pregnant with my little brother. She was sitting at a table with someone who'd been a friend, once upon a time, but who'd married this woman I've only ever heard described as an incredible harpie. This woman had also brought a friend. The two ladies hadn't even gone to school with my mom, but were playing Gossipy, Judgmental Bitch, like they had. Thing is, my mom grew up in a small town, so everyone knew everyone else's dirt, and this lady had obviously been talking to someone, or heard from her husband, some of that grubby stuff. Toward the end of the evening, everyone (except my mom) is 13 sheets to the wind, and that's when Pregnant Lady and Harpie Lady get into it. I don't actually recall if anyone's ever remembered enough to tell me what my mother's side of this bitchfest was, but everyone I've heard the story from agrees that the crux came when Harpie Wife Lady said to my mom, "You probably don't know who the father of this one is, either."
My mom, infamous for her ability to rise to an occasion, sat on that comment for a couple of minutes, and then had to go to the bathroom. Pregnancy, amirite?! To get to the restroom, she had to pass between Harpie Lady's chair and a brick wall. She gathered her things, got up, and as she approached, grabbed Harpie Lady by the hair, yanked her head back, and slammed her face into said wall.
She bypassed the bathroom, continued out of the building, and hasn't gone to a reunion since.
I'd also like to say for the record that she absolutely did (does) know who my father is.
Class of 91. My ten year reunion was on September 21-22. Of 2001. Let me repeat that, my high school reunion was 10 days after September 11, 2001. I wasn't going to go, even though I still lived relatively close to my hometown, but a close friend of mine, back in August, convinced me that I had to be there. She had moved to Miami and hadn't seen me in several years.
So, I went. Of course, since it was right after 9/11 lots of people couldn't get flights in. Including my treacherous friend from Miami. So I at the pre-reunion cocktail hour at a rather douchey cigar bar and was approached by the girl I went to senior prom with, whom I broke up with soon thereafter, who proceeded to tell me what a dick I was and how she loved me and I crushed her etc. etc. etc.
Setting the scene...At the time of my reunion, I was a single father of who had spent 4 years in the Marine Corps instead of college and was working a shit civil service job and living in an apartment. She graduated, was married and had a great job (her husband was there, btw). Basically told her she was right, I was an asshole, and thought that was that.
The next night, I am sitting at the reunion talking to a friend of mine when guess who sidles up, very drunk? I excused myself to use the bathroom and just left. Worst ever.
From Buford T. Justice:
My ten-year reunion was in 2010. I went to a large, pretty non-cliquey high school, so lots of us from that class attended (about 100 grads, plus dates) and had a pretty good time. The drama came later in the evening, when these two twin boys from our class showed up. I barely remembered them, but apparently in the ten years since high school, I shit you not, one of them had become a white supremacist. Fun! (Why you would go to your 40% minority graduating class reunion after such a life change, I'll never understand.) So a literal fight breaks out between their wives. And not just a slap fight, either - one wife ran up to the other, but instead of the hug/kiss on the cheek thing that everyone had been doing, she shoved the other girl's shoulder as hard as she could, and that girl took the shove and came back with a cocked fist. The cops had to be called, and they took statements from a bunch of the other guests that saw the whole thing. The best part is that they didn't even shut down the party after the incident. So imagine all these dressed-up people with wine glasses in hand, chatting away while cops wander around asking for witnesses to support the differing stories of the two drunk, brawling sisters-in-law sitting on the curb just outside the venue.
All in all, a very memorable and enjoyable evening.
I had my 10 year high school reunion in 2010. In the months leading up to this I had been running a fair amount so that I would look good for the reunion. I had a reputation as a partier and jock in high school and I still partied pretty hard so I made a conscious effort to not show up to the reunion completely shitfaced. I failed. I went to a friends house before it to watch some football. I chose this house because this dude mainly smoked pot so I thought "a little weed before won't hurt me." After a few hours of burning I go meet some friends that were skipping the reunion at a local bar to "have a few." Anyone who drinks on a regular basis knows that "having a few" at 5 in the afternoon on a Saturday in the South during football season means your looking to get completely fucked up. Poor choice on my part. I show up 2 hours late for the reunion party just hammered, like Myrtle Beach drunk. I quickly run into a girl that had a huge crush on me in high school and has since gotten pretty hot. Things are going somewhat well until my ex-gf (now ex wife) shows up. I forgot that earlier in the day I told her to swing by if she was in the area. Big mistake. Drama insues and I look like a big asshole to everyone except the girl from high school I had been filling full of beers and shots so that I could get some action later. We head to an after party at a bar where I black out and proceed to accidentally grab my friend's wife's boobs. Not even sure how this happened but it did, and a lot of people saw it. I woke up to a cab driver telling me I was home. I didn't get any action, I didn't get any new clients, and looked like a fucking raging drunk. The 15 year reunion is around the corner and I'll be fresh off a divorce. Look out CHS class of 2000!!!
Feel free to keep them coming in the comments!