Illustration: Jim Cooke

I started working at in April of last year, and ever since, I’ve received a constant barrage of always furious, often antisemitic, and rarely coherent emails to my inbox. Reading these is, truthfully, the single best part of my day.

Positive emails are nice, but every single piece of hate mail is an unintentional comic masterpiece in its own right, no matter how small. Take this one:


So to start this new chapter off with a bang, and to give Deadspin’s readers a bit of inspiration, I offer you my favorite bits of hate mail from the past year and change. Now, let the good times roll.

Trump Enthusiasts

I’ve written more about Trump in the past year than I even want to consider: His rallies, his failed businesses, his hair—each one more of a nightmare than the last. The silver lining in this mountain of Trump reporting, though, is that no one offers feedback quite like a Trump voter.

Pokémon Deniers

Pokémon Go! Who doesn’t love Pokémon Go? I know I do, which is why I wrote a helpful guide for Gawker’s readers when the game first came out. Some people seemed to disagree.

Smash Mouth Apologists

Smash Mouth’s twitter account is a Sisyphean hell in which Guy Fieri spends his day feuding with anonymous Shrek fans online. Still, Smash Mouth fans apparently exist, too. And they demand to be heard.

Journalism Professors

Everyone’s a critic. Everyone also apparently holds graduate degrees in journalism. They’d like to offer me some tips.

Repeat Offenders

And still, some of these righteous readers consistently come back for more. Because, however much they hate me, they must hate themselves even more. Friend, I feel you.





[Note: There is a significant chance that Lester is a troll.]

Good Christians

They have a point.