Screenshot: YouTube

According to a report from Jezebel (Gizmodo Media Group’s shark blog), hit CBS sitcom Kevin Can Wait has been canceled after two seasons and 48 laugh-packed episodes. This national travesty happened at some point in the last two weeks, but the loyal fan community of “Waiters” is already clamoring for a reboot of the beloved series. Deadspin readers know about this website’s affection for Kevin Can Wait and the KCW extended universe, and May 12 or whenever the show was canceled was a dark day. You will not be surprised to learn that we too support bringing the Kevin-verse back for another “fart vacation.”

However!

It would not be enough to simply run that shit back and face the possibility of another controversy like the one that happened when they replaced Donna Gable (played by Erinn Hayes) with Leah Remini’s Vanessa Cellucci (a change we totally fuckin’ called, by the way). Fans have been through enough, and so has our on-screen father, Kevin Gable.

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So here is my plan: Sell HBO the intellectual property rights to Kevin Can Wait and have them make a Kevin Can Wait World in the Westworld universe. Both shows have a lot in common, namely the letter W and also a passionate fan community that feeds on theorycraft and extended universe lore. Westworld has shown in recent weeks that...

(LIGHT SPOILERs)

...they’re willing to take the show to other themed “worlds” inside the larger robot fucking theme park environment...

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(END LIGHT SPOILERs)

...so what better world to build than a Kevin Can Wait world? The death robots could find out a great deal about their core humanity by trying to liberate robots who struggle with life after retirement from the police force or adjusting to living at home with your retired cop father. Imagine Dolores cradling Vanessa Carlucci’s face and explaining to her that there is a whole other world out there beyond folding XXXL “Property of NYPD WEIGHTLIFTING” sweatpant shorts. Imagine how fans would react when the show reveals what might have happened if a reanimated Donna Gable returned to the Gable family and put Kevin and Vanessa into a real bind.

I want to live in that world, but I’d happily settle for seeing it in a prestige HBO drama. Thank you.